Day 24 - A Letter To Your Parents

Happy Thanksgiving!

This is an emotional post for me. Since my dad's death, I've been much closer with my mom, but I also keep finding things I wish I'd said or done for my dad. I know regret is silly and pointless in this situation, but that doesn't stop me from feeling it. So, here goes.....

Dear Mama,

I'm so sorry the last few months have been so difficult for you. I wish I could take away all the stress, pain and upset. I know that things will get easier with time (at least, I hope they will), but I'm sorry that, in the meantime, you have to endure this. I know we've talked some since Daddy died, but I wanted to make sure you knew how much I love and appreciate you. You've done so much for us! You've been there when we needed you and you've never hesitated to offer help when we needed it. I know that sometimes I get frustrated with you because you want to help when I don't necessarily need it, but I do appreciate that you're always there for me. I know that I only need ask and you'll be right there with everything you have. I'm sorry that we sometimes disagree. I do know, though, that this is simply part of the both of us being human. I love you very, very much and I thank God everyday that you and Daddy were my parents. I could have wound up with parents who didn't love me or care for me and that would have been such a terrible situation that I can't even begin to think about it.

Love you so very much,

Lynn

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Dear Daddy,

I miss you so much! I never knew how hard life would be without you. I wish I hadn't had to discover this information so soon. Everyday I wake up and wish I could talk to you. I'd love to be able to hug you, to talk to you, to share the moments of the day. There have been so many occassions since you died when I've found myself laughing about something or being outraged about something and thinking how I couldn't wait to share it with you, only to remember you weren't here any longer. It breaks my heart everytime I have the realisation again. Today was Thanksgiving and all day I've thought of you. I remember last Thanksgiving and how you had just started feeling bad again around that time. I thought how you would have liked the meal I was cooking and what comments you would have made about it. I know you're still watching after me - I feel it everyday - but I wish you were here so I could hear you talking to me and see your smiling face. I'm so afraid I'll forget your Daddy scent. It makes me cry when I think that one day you'll be just a distant memory. I hope I can always remember the small things about you. I love you, Daddy, and I'll never forget you!

Love you so much,

Lynn