Last Thursday, Lady V came to visit me. She told me that she had a phone call around 2:30am that morning saying that Juno had had the baby. Baby was a girl, named one of the names we liked as a first name and sharing a middle name with me. Juno's sister told Lady V to tell us to come get the baby! At first we were distraught because we're no further with our homestudy or any of the other things we need to get done. Then I asked some lovely ladies who are much more knowledgeable (you girls know who you are.....Thanks!) and I was given hope that we might be able to get a judge to sign a petition of temporary custody.
Before I would make the call to our caseworker though, I asked Lady V to have Juno or a family member call us. We'd still never spoken to her and, frankly, I don't trust any situation until I hear it from the source. So a long wait punctuated by several text messages from me to Lady V asking if she'd been in touch with them ensued. When I say a long wait, I mean long. A full 24 hours.
Finally, the following day, Lady V texted me and stated that Juno's mom had decided she wanted Juno to take the baby home and attempt parenting for a month. If that doesn't work out, the plan is for Juno's mom to adopt the baby and raise her as Juno's sister.
Sometimes life is hard to stomach. But, I'm actually doing okay. No tears this time. No devestation. I don't know if that is, perhaps, because I never thought of this adoption as a real thing or what, but I'm grateful it's a little easier this time. Maybe, perversely, each loss actually gets a little easier. Maybe you finally get so used to life kicking you in the teeth, that you start to, not enjoy the taste of blood, but to resolve yourself to the fact that it's simply what will happen.
Good things will come to us though. Soon. I just know it.